|
The album 'Ferret' arrived in the late summer of 99' to a fanfare comprising a trombone and triangle. On its release critics hailed it as a "[superb] album". Here for the first time, exclusive to www.follyferrets.freeservers.com are the complete lyrics of the album that would find itself in approximately four peoples homes.
INTRODUCTION (0.51)
do you believe everything you see on tv?
do you understand the concept of irony?
can't you see we're tinged with self-parody?
so try not and take us too seriously.
felix: guitar
john beck: vocal
WELCOME TO FERRETLAND (4.36)
welcome all to ferretland
songs crafted from our own hand
(welcome to ferretland)
entrance to the place is free
come on join the family
(welcome to ferretland)
people now listen up
drink from the folly ferret cup
(welcome to ferretland)
add drums, keyboard, bass, guitar
and pretty soon we'll all be stars
(welcome to ferretland)
and in our world nothing is wrong
stoats, weasels, goatmen dance to our songs, our songs
sing and play a happy song
and nothing will go wrong
(welcome to ferretland)
lyrics made up minutes ago
no surprise just let it flow
(welcome to ferretland)
lots of people in the band
more than the number of our fans
(welcome to ferretland)
production values we have none
just a bunch or sorry songs
(welcome to ferretland)
and in our world nothing is wrong
stoats, weasels, goatmen dance to our songs, our songs
and we are out of time
pint of stella and white wine
(welcome to ferretland)
the voice is mine no mistake
its not worth a duplicate
(welcome to ferretland)
press play record and make a sound
this is the way of our band
(welcome to ferretland)
statements none, nothing to say
no-ones listening anyway
(welcome to ferretland)
and in our world nothing is wrong
stoats, weasels, goatmen dance to our songs, our songs
caroline: backing vocals, piano.
felix: guitars, piano, vocals.
CROP OF EQUALITY (4.34)
the workers must once more unite
and stop the proletariats plight
for the peoples party must liberate
the masses from this oppressive bourgeois state
come brothers to the field
and comrade we will yield
a new crop of equality
from which all men can feed
the rights way is of selfishness and greed
the rich have plenty, the poor still need
so down with the running dog of imperialism
let left in your heart do not delay
come brothers to the field
and comrade we will yield
a new crop of equality
from which all men can feed
you have nothing to lose but your heavy chains
and your eternal freedom to gain
so take up the sickle in your left hand
and under marx's banner we'll reform this once great land
come brothers to the field
and comrade we will yield
a new crop of equality
from which all men can feed
felix: acoustic rhythm guitar, electric guitar, vocals.
john beck: acoustic slide guitar, bass, mandolin.
sam: piano.
rufus: drums.
THE DIAMONDS OF MONTE CARLO (5.16)
have you ever seen
such beauty
of wealth, great value
passed though nobility
wont you get me, bank robbery
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
are precious stones
greater than emeralds
sparkle in the light
gem, a treasure
glory, of gods own
wont you get me, bank robbery
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
are precious stones
perfect supperlative
devalue to wear them
deserving no lady
forever peerless
wont you get me, bank robbery
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
are precious stones
oh those chosen people, oh those chosen few
oh, oh, oh
oh no
the diamonds of monte carlo
are precious stones
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
"oh dad she's driving me mad,
oh if you stay,
oh dad she's driving me mad"
come see, come see, these precious stones
the diamonds of monte carlo
the diamonds of monte carlo
(i forgot to say 'the precious stones' at the end, i'm a bit disapointed)
bret anderson: vocals
felix: acoustic guitar, hairdryer, percussion, shower.
john beck: bass, elctric guitar.
rufus: drums.
100% BIG BOY WHOOP ASS ACTION (0.41)
felix: guitars.
sam: decks.
LADY CHARMER (4.12)
all this love is not a game
im still pretty foxy all the same
no lady can resist my charm
they're like soft putty in my palm
they say i look like tom cruise
i say honestly i dont think so....but i do
and i know the ladies are so keen
i am a love machine
i cut such a dashing figure
the ladies are so keen
i am a love machine
i cut such a dashing figure
oh how careless of me
i must apologise im so sorry
here let me help you
it really is the least i can do
here let me by you a drink
is your coat real mink?
no, i could have sworn it was
i really did think because
what with you being a lady of such class
come across and have a glass....or maybe two?
and i know the ladies are so keen
i am a love machine
i cut such a dashing figure
the ladies are so keen
i am a love machine
i cut such a dashing figure
(spoken) well hello my pretty little thing how about a little kiss
come on you know you want to
thats right little lady im going to give you some sweet lovin'
oh yeah
later that evening she's had a lot
ive weaved my magic, yeah im hot
how would you like to come back to mine
for coffee of even wine
"i really shouldnt do"
come on you know you want to
come on its getting cold
and of talking we get bored
im sure we'll find something to do
come on you know you want to
"you're such a charmer"
yeah i know....how right you are
and i know the ladies are so keen
i am a love machine
i cut such a dashing figure
the ladies are so keen
i am a love machine
i cut such a dashing figure
felix: guitar, male vocal
melissa: bass, female vocals
rufus: piano
sam: drums
LO-FI LOSER IN LOVE (8.39)
im sorry the young girl said
rejection i feel dead
ive got to go
where the people want to know
nice to see you once again
introduction to a friend
rely on you
yeah if you want to
entertainer of my own
always be alone
ive gone away
no jokes today
laugh a lot a lot with me
still it means i'll always be
interesting space
never a handsome face
for i forever will be a loser in love (not my love)
always just a good bloke im never quite enough (not my love)
for i forever will be a loser in love (not my love)
always just a good bloke im never quite enough (never quite...)
im living here
with a lonely fear
open my thoughts
to my life of sorts
cant you hear me calling out
dont want to have to shout
no second glance
no chance
play the fool for you all
have a goof time for
the evening ends
im a passing trend
go home a good time had
into depression bad
entertainer know not my mind
will i ever find?
for i forever will be a loser in love (not my love)
always just a good bloke im never quite enough (not my love)
for i forever will be a loser in love (not my love)
always just a good bloke im never quite enough (never quite...)
do you hear me calling
im still falling for you
im still here calling
and you are not falling for me
im still falling
and you still calling me back to you
i think you could be calling
but your not and im still falling for you
(spoken) i wish you would stop laughing at my jokes
and gaze past laughter, past the frail body
and share one moment of what i feel for you
something i cant explain
words afraid of meanings
all i have is a piece of plastic and a faceless memory
and an emptiness that eats away at every part of my being
i'll never know if you even remember
the boy who made you laugh
i'll never make you cry
do you remember me
do you remember me
do you
do you remember
i dont think so
i dont thing so
for i forever will be a loser in love (not my love)
always just a good bloke im never quite enough (not my love)
for i forever will be a loser in love (not my love)
always just a good bloke im never quite enough (never quite...)
do you hear me calling
you're not falling for me
im still here calling
your not falling for me
i keep on falling
and im still calling you
i think you could be falling
im still falling for you
oh oh oh its you
im still here calling
but your not falling for me
im still here calling
and your not falling for me
i keep on calling
im still calling you
felix: acoustic guitar, backward guitar, programming, violin, vocals.
sam: drums, keyboard, spoken poem.
lo-fi loser in love contains a sample of 'how soon is now?' by the smiths and extracts from the bbc's science and religion spoken word collection.
THE FERRET SONG (3.56)
ferret, my lovely ferret
you are my ferret
and rabid you are not
ferret, you wicked ferret
oh yeah you ferret
rabid you are not
there is no animal comparable to the ferret
certainly not the sheep, aardvark or the goat
in a fight the ferret could spill a weasels blood
for he surely is a tricky customer
ferret, my lovely ferret
you are my ferret
and rabid you are not
ferret, you luscious ferret
you gorgeous ferret
you really are so hot
ferret when you're near my blood boils in anticipation
by the size of your belly you might make a nice stew
mixed with kidneys and a touch of garlic
it would be a meal fit for a king
ferret, my lovely ferret
you are my ferret
and vicious you are not
ferret, you handsome ferret
you cunning ferret
you dont miss a trick
oh when im with you you set my pulse a-racing
you scratch me with you're claws
tickle my eyebrows with your furry paws
uh-oh ferret
uh-oh ferret
uh-oh ferret
oh oh oh oh ferret
oh oh oh oh ferret
oh oh oh oh ferret
oh oh oh oh ferret
ferret, i love you ferret
do you love me ferret
i think you are so hot
felix: guitar, gargling, vocals.
sam: backing vocals, keyboard.
BLACK RAVEN OF THE NIGHT (2.43)
(dedicated to melissa)
(spoken intro) i wonder who you think you are, you damn well think you're God or something. God give life, God taketh it away, not you, i think you are the devil itself.
black raven of the night
you are the bird of night
how many secrets do you hold
black raven of the night
killing while in flight
do you ever feel for your victims families
black raven of the night
do you delight
in killing your prey?
black raven of the night
ready for a fight
more twisted than the devil himself, hah hah
look a lonely ferret
swoop down he's dinner tonight
look a lonely weasel
strayed from the path
fear in his eyes
he knows hes going to die
blood
blood
blood
black raven of the night
such a fearsome sight
for woodland creatures and alike
black raven of the night
with a deadly bite
signals death across the country
felix: drill, guitar, vocals
rufus: drums, piano
DECLARATION (4.20)
and now we're nearing the end
i hope we did not offend
anyone of you our fans
in reflection im happy with the band
its an album of many highs
with a couple of fillers aside
workers song a personal favourite
goodnight not such a hit
but well worth a listen im sure you'll agree
i hope you enjoy it as much as me
so thanks very much thanks for listening to the album
although to tell you the truth you probably only bought it cos you know one of us
so thanks very much thanks for listening to the album
although to tell you the truth you probably only bought it cos you know one of us
(spoken) john; so how did the album go for you, i suppose you liked the self depreciating wit?
felix; it was passable in places.
j; well i guess it was wasnt it really, i suppose we're quite post-modern.
f; yes, its quite an interesting idea to have a discussion at the end of a song.
j; yet in some ways you could just say we were running out of ideas and it was an easy way out.
f; yes thats true i couldnt be bothered to write some proper lyrics for the rest of the song. but i suppose it does prove once and for all that we are quite 'crazy'.
j; yeah, when you say the word 'crazy' why do you make those inverted comma signs?
f; because we are 'crazy'.
j; you're doing it again, i suppose you think its irony or funny....
f; its part of our status as a novelty act john.
j; ive noticed this, you're always trying to promote us as a novelty band but listen to this guitar playing. thats me, im a serious musician. listen to that, listen, its good.
f; brilliant, really, excellent.
j; ..........
f; ..........i suppose the strong structures are fairly unimaginative, they lack any real quality to the song, the productions poor again......
j; .......im ashamed, im leaving town when this comes out.......
f; the singing isnt great, i admit that, but basically no one else would help out.
j; yeah, it was left to you was it? and you're upset about that.
f; yes.
j; no you're not you enjoyed it. but it gives me great pleasure to agree with you, you're singing was rubbish and.......you're stupid face.......black raven of the night, fishman, thats just 'filmstar' by suede, its the same song.
f; people might say nicked, i like to call them 'influences'. yes we are strongly influenced by say, filmstar is very, uh sorry, fishman is very similar to filmstar.
j; you didnt even bother changing the words.
felix: acoustic guitar, hoover, spoken words, vocals.
john beck: bass, electric guitar, fire alarm, spoken vocals.
RETURN OF THE LITTLE GREEN MICE FROM MARS (0.49)
meow.
felix: guitar.
john beck: guitar, henry the cat.
henry the cat: vocal.
return of the little green mice from mars contains a sample of 'pick up if you're there' by mercury rev.
RADIATOR (3.25)
all good girls deserve a radiator
all good girls listen to me
all good girls should be warm in winter
all good girls listen to me
all good girls invest in central heating
all good girls listen to me
we dont want to be electric heater
we dont want to be electric heater
but we do want a radiator yeah
we do want a radiator yeah
we dont want to be electric heater
we dont want to be electric heater
but we do want a radiator yeah
we do want a radiator yeah
all good girls go buy a radiator
all good girls listen to me
all good girls its getting cold at winter
all good girls listen to me
all good girls install central heating
all good girls listen to me
we dont want to be electric heater
we dont want to be electric heater
but we do want a radiator yeah
we do want a radiator yeah
we dont want to be electric heater
we dont want to be electric heater
but we do want a radiator yeah
we do want a radiator yeah
felix: backing choir, bass, guitars, vocals.
sam: backing choir, drums.
FISHMAN (3.23)
fishman, super hero, make saving fish look so easy
fishman, super hero, save those fish tonight
fishman, flying through the sea, zapping enemies, it looks so easy
fishman, flying through the sea, zapping enemies tonight
what would you do if they ridiculed your name?
what would you do if they took your fins,
made it a sin,
to be a fishman
fishman, look so strong, make wrestling poodles look so easy
fishman, so strong, wrestle those poodles tonight
fishman, protecting the sea, keeping it safe looks so easy
fishman, protecting the sea, keeping it safe tonight
what would you do if they ridiculed your name?
what would you do if they took your fins,
made it a sin,
to be a fishman
felix: bubbles, electric guitar, hand claps, shower, vocal.
john beck: acoustic guitar, bass.
rufus: percussion.
sam: drums, hand claps.
GOODNIGHT RODENTS EVERYWHERE (2.55)
skys getting dark its time for bed
cling on tightly to big ted
the animals settle down too
pigeon gives one last coo
close your eyes your hamsters safe
the cage is sealed tightly it wont escape
say goodnight little ferret
say goodnight little stoat
say goodnight little ewok
sweet dreams little one
asleep sucking there thumbs
isnt it lovely on a night like this
moon rises above the mist
goodnight sleeptight
mind the goblins dont bite
say goodnight little goblin
say goodnight little ewok
say goodnight all woodland creatures
say goodnight
say goodnight
say goodnight
mind the goblins dont bite
caroline: violin.
felix: guitar
melissa: vocal
NOTHING (7.52)
i told my love, i held my love,
i held her alluring heart
i dreamt of a pure and perfect embrace
i dreamt of your face
i lye down breath the water of the sea that calls itself
tranquillity, over me
tranquillity, over me
oh baby you sigh in vain
to behold my heavy chains
you searched your holy fears
and shed on the ground your tears
for in those days when i was hopeless before you just
loved me more, loved me more
you loved me more
now your not sure
loved me more, loved me more
you loved me more
now your so unsure
im feeling peace inside
the darkness has subsided from my heart
my confidence restored
i will no longer fall if shes by my side
trembling cold in ghostly fears
oh she doth depart
our love is in the air
and ive stopped breathing
for the gentle wind does move through the rushes dank
weeping, weeping
weeping, weeping
i trust you will tell me if i am making a fool of myself
all ive ever said ive just been making a fool of myself
these ideas in my head ive just been making a fool of myself
i trust you will tell me if i am making a fool of myself
(and now) im feeling peace inside
the darkness has subsided from my heart
my confidence restored
i will no longer fall if shes by my side
found you blind, taught you to see and now you know not yourself or me
found you blind, taught you to see and now you know not yourself or me
taking pictures of my soul, all the angles which noone knows
taking pictures of my soul, all the angles which noone knows
im feeling peace inside
the darkness has subsided from my heart
my confidence restored
i will no longer fall if shes by my side
felix: acoustic guitar, vocal.
john beck: electric guitar.
melissa: violin.
rufus: piano.
sam: drums.
|
